Friday, October 31, 2008
now the wait.....................
I'm feeling quite comfortable and not too anxious actually........ :)
Stay tuned. K's getting the call on the cell at work......and until the correct people are told first, I will not be posting......but will do my best to contact those people ASAP. :) (ya know, Popi, Mom, Ryan......)
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Also, I found this website today:
Causes & Symptoms
The exact cause of morning sickness is unknown, but several factors are thought likely to contribute to the illness, including:
Many pregnant women experience postnasal drip and/or nasal congestion, triggered by high levels of estrogen in their bloodstream. Estrogen increases the blood flow throughout the body, including the mucous membrane of the nose. This postnasal drip contributes to upset stomach in many pregnant women.
But then again I do have estrogen patches on - but didn't seem to have this issue with them when I first started taking them?????......
oh we shall see..........................
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Today I plan on making a card or 2, boiling some eggs for my dear wife to take with her to the work potluck tomorrow, and hanging out. :) Tomorrow is my busy day.......here's what I have planned.......
Go to Jenae's with K to get her hair done for Halloween (stay tuned for pics!)
Go to Bellingham IVF for pregnancy blood test
Stop by Trader Joes and get me some more rice milk and whatever else I feel like buying
Come back home and try to figure out if I feel like going to the work potluck or not :)
Put our hiding pumpkins out (people have smashed a few in our neighborhood so they've been on our back porch!) oh wait, K has to do this...... no lifting! :)
Listen for my phone to ring.....but not answer it......and wait, wait, and wait until K comes home to get the results......and did I say Wait? :)
Try not to go to nut-so waiting........ :)
Hand out lots and lots of candy to young and old.....and have fun!
(We chose the night where we are going to be most social.......to find out the results - grand huh?) It usually takes a bit to soak in.......
Ok, enough, enough........
and did I mention I'd really love to be going to Corvallis tomorrow?..............that'd be a be all to end all of a week of vacation......... but it isn't going to happen.............
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
I'm not a big shopper...so doing that scene doesn't really sound like "fun". I don't really like to watch movies and/or TV. I'm not really a huge reader.....oh and my knitting has been at work (I need to email K!) I could be doing that!
I've taken a nap each day, which is nice :) I'd like to do something fun tonight..... don't know what that might be.....payday isn't until Friday........
Am I pregnant? am I not?.... that question is repeated through this brain of mine several times a day...... do I do the blood test in Bellingham? Do I call and have the info forwarded to my local doctor?.... it'd give me something to do.....at least on Friday.......*shrug*
wanna entertain me with any comments? :)
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Monday, October 27, 2008
We got an email from Uncle Joe telling (K) the Great White Huntress (who set out the bait) had caught one BIG DEAD rat!
We asked him for pictures - doesn't have a camera. We asked him to describe, and here is the description:
By BIG I mean body 6-8 inches long and 6 inch tail. It was brown and gray. I am not sure about what you mean by fluffy tail. It did not have a normal rat tail. It was shorter then the body, but there was lots of hair and the end (about 1-1 1/2 inches) was bushy.
I wonder if there are any more living with it? K said - at least its a CUTE rat.
Thanks for letting us come and enjoy each and every one of you! :)
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Also, when I asked the grade of the eggs - they just told me they were "great". REALLY irritates me that they wouldn't tell me the actual grades. Then I asked what the grades of the Blastocycsts were......and they said they can't grade those because they are millions of cells.......but upon looking it up online they do grade Blasts........ :(
I may call on Monday and just have them send me all my records - and I'll see for myself - the grades! :) or see if I can get Karen to help me figure it out....... guess it doesn't really matter now - but may give me some peace of mind :)
these are true thoughts......even BEFORE coffee! :)
Saturday, October 25, 2008
We sent Mom off on her way today to Ryan's for a few days. It sure was nice to have her here for a week.......I don't know how well of an entertainer I am, honestly........plus the time we got to spend together.......was mostly days on which I had to be down........but it was fun nonetheless, even if we watched Woot for over 24 hours and missed the damn bag of crap!!
K and I had bacon and eggs for breakfast this morning - man it was good. I was craving bacon :) We bought some special, more natural bacon - and we both didn't burp it up. We decided the extra cost was worth it. :) We then watched Into The Wild with Dad (Great movie, again!) and then got ready for the day........ headed out to the store for a few things, pumpkin patch, and then came home. We had carne asada for dinner with guacamole and salsa with tortillas. It was yummy.
I'm sitting down now and writing this and am exhausted.......will be hitting the sack soon.
Tomorrow all of us will head down to Aunt Tom and Uncle Mary's for some pumpkin carving, some good vibe prego drumming, and just plain hanging out with family! :) can't wait!
Friday, October 24, 2008
some special pleasure
To the hours of your day
To know you're being thought of
In the very warmest way...
And when your birthday's over,
Hope that you'll remember, too,
The same warm thoughts as always
Will keep going out to you!
~ Happy Birthday ~
Thursday, October 23, 2008
(Posted with permission)
Frequently Asked Questions About Unschooling
When we first started unschooling, I would get on the (now defunct) unschooling.com message boards and ask at least one question just about every day. These quickly became "Dragonfly's Question of the Day," and the women and men who answered me showed considerable patience and creativity in their replies.
Nowadays, I answer a fair number of newbie questions myself, primarily on the unschooling.info message boards. I mostly enjoy it, and I am mostly patient in my replies. Creative? Not so much. There are only so many ways to answer the same questions.
So, here are some FAQs and my answers to them, with some answers swiped (from myself) right from the boards.
1. How will my kids learn anything if I don't teach them?
They will learn the way adults learn. Something will catch their interest, they will explore it until they are satisfied (for now), and then they'll move on. Later, they'll learn something else that reminds them of that thing they learned before, and they'll make a connection. "Oh, hey, that's like..."
True knowledge is made up of those connections, and that's what unschoolers value.
2. I'm ready to try unschooling, but my spouse isn't convinced. What do I do?
Remember that your spouse's concerns stem from the same place that your interest in unschooling does: concern for your kids. Then, from that place of shared concern, ask to be given some time to explore this intriguing way of homeschooling. Share some resources. Encourage participation. Ask for a moratorium on criticism of how the kids' time is spent.
As an aside, I'm not entirely sure why Frank went along with it. It was a big leap for such an academically minded guy. Maybe it was faith in me, maybe it was faith in our kids, maybe it was a simple desire to be agreeable and get me to be quiet. :-) Whatever. He signed off on the experiment, and no more than three months later found himself in the role of stay-at-home unschooling dad. And here we are...
3. How do we start?
Relax. Take your summer vacation now (even if it's the dead of winter). Say "Yes" a lot. Have fun. Play with your kids. Watch. Wait. Stay calm.
From March 2006:
[Strewing] involves making a wonderful variety of resources available to your kids with no expectation or requirement that the resources ever be used. These can be books, toys, or supplies left casually on tables or in bathrooms or presented quietly or with fanfare directly to your child. They can be posters hung on walls, craft or music or gaming activities that *you* start, Web pages left open on the computer, magazines subscribed to, alternate driving routes taken, etc. It is SO fun to do, and it creates an environment of discovery and fun in your house.
The things you strew can be in support of interests your [child] has expressed or about just any old thing you think of. In the recent past, I've strewn my daughters' paths by:
Leaving http://www.WorldWideWords.org open on the computer to the page outlining the origins of the phrase "mind your p's and q's," which my daughter had asked about in passing one day. (She read it and then continued surfing the site.)
Taking the whole family to a dirt-bike event. (Fun for all four of us.)
Bringing home some bargain books on poetry and art, plus a history book called "Lies My Teacher Told Me," that really grabbed everybody's attention! :-) (All three books have been flipped through, but it was my dh who read the history book cover to cover.)
Bringing home a new XBox game called Gotham Racing or something like that. (We've all played, the girls laughed SO much together. The XBox was on for at least a couple of hours every day for a week or so; now it's been off for days.)
Leaving out a book I already own about building catapults. (No takers yet.)
Inviting over a friend and her 12yo son whom my girls had never met before. (A very fun evening. One of the highlights was my friend's son completely un-self-consciously demonstrating a folk dance he'd learned.)
All this happened in and around all our usual activities. Actually, there's been nothing usual about our schedule these past few weeks, which goes to show how little time strewing can take! But never doubt that your usual activites can provide a lot of strewing, too. In our case, we've been making arrangements for my younger daughter's departure to England (lots of history and geography and tidbits gleaned), and I've been doing a lot of networking to arrange some get-togethers with local unschoolers because my older daughter wants to meet more people. And then there's work and going to watch my dh earn his first Iaido (Japanese swordsmanship) ranking and, oh yeah, HOURS of prep work for my younger daughter's 12th birthday party on Saturday — she wants to do about a dozen projects out of this wizard party book she found at the library. We're making candied rose petals today — a first for me in several ways, and yet another example of how they strew *my* path with interesting things.
4. What is deschooling?
From Feb. 2004:
Your son needs to deschool... He *needs* to play those games. He needs it the same as he needs food to eat and air to breathe. Try thinking of the time he spends on those games as chemotherapy. If he had cancer, you wouldn't begrudge him his treatments, right? Well, the schooling has been eating away at his joy, sense of self, curiosity and creativity, much like a tumor eats other cells.
Deschooling is an ongoing process whereby kids and parents recover from the sort of brain cancer that happens in school.
For kids, the cure for this cancer is simply time spent doing just whatever they want. Ideally, they have the unflinching support of their parents during this time.
How much time? The usual rule of thumb is one month of deschooling for every year spent in school. So, for example, I knew MJ was going to need approximately 5 months of deschooling time when we pulled her out of school in 4th grade.
Of course, "knowing" this and actually staying calm while it is happening are two very different things. My daughter watched TV for four months straight. Scary? You betcha. Did I offer unflinching support? Umm, not exactly. I probably artificially extended her deschooling with my periodic (frequent) "Don't you want to do something else?" comments.
Then it was summer and she went outside to play. But in September, when the neighbor kids went back to school, she returned to the TV. This time, however, she had her sketchbook on her lap and sketched while she watched TV. It was a change, and, fortunately, I recognized its significance and kept my big mouth shut.
Nowadays, MJ is still video-oriented, just like her dad. She probably always will be. But the TV is simply a tool that provides entertainment, learning, social opportunities, what have you, on demand (or On Demand), when she feels like it.
For parents, deschooling can take much longer. Or it comes in waves. We've been unschooling for more than five years, and Frank and I still have to monitor our thoughts, speech, reactions, expectations, etc. We still explore unschooling concepts regularly and talk about them with other unschooling parents. For us, living this life requires regular refresher courses. So to speak.
5. What do I tell the school district?
That you're homeschooling. You are! Recordkeeping requirements vary from state to state, but the most rigorous is probably New York, with its IHPs and portfolios and I don't know what all. And yet many unschoolers thrive in New York, without telling a single lie.
Start keeping a journal of your kids' daily activities. At intervals, translate what they've been doing into school-speak. You'll be surprised at how many age-specific learning objectives they touch on, naturally. Others, they'll touch on at different ages (oftentimes much earlier than the schools would introduce them), but they'll still get them.
They don't call 'em the basics for nothing. And a perusal of World Book's Typical Course of Study will show you exactly how basic the basics are.
6. That's fine for elementary school, but what about high school?
First off, question your assumptions. High school does not look the same for every student, and the high school years will not look the same for every unschooler. Some end up taking some courses. Some get intrigued by a subject and read college-level textbooks that Mom found for $1 on the clearance shelf at Half Price Books that have been gathering dust on the shelf at home for more than a year. Some learn skills on their own by following interests that lead them into jobs that become careers. And some do a combination of these.
Higher math. Chemistry. Foreign languages. Unschoolers study these things, because they want to or because they have a goal for which studying these things is a requirement. How do they study them? Just the way an adult would if the adult wanted or needed to study them.
Remember that MJ signed up for a credited community college class at 14!
A big part of an unschooling parent's job is finding ways for our kids to learn what they want to learn. It's just something we do. In our case, we're in an urban area with lots of resources, so it's not even that hard.
7. What about the ACT and SAT? Can unschoolers get into college?
Yes! To a college, an unschooler is a homeschooler. Homeschooler entrance requirements will vary from college to college. Cafi Cohen has written a good bit on the subject of homeschoolers getting into college:
The ACT and SAT tests are open to homeschoolers.
In some states, a diploma can be issued by your school (your parents). Again, the acceptability of this document will vary from college to college. As will the acceptability of a GED.
The better question here is, how can this particular unschooler get into The School that will help her achieve her dreams? You can't plan for every college in the world. Pick the few that you are most interested in, learn their requirements, and then go from there.
And keep in mind that there's no law that says the applicant has to be able to meet their requirements by age 18 or any other magic number.
8. What about socialization?
More assumptions revealed. If you've got some time, I expound on this topic at length here.
9. Will my child fall flat, or fall short, if I don't push/encourage/expect?
Will your child fall flat if you *do*? It's possible. You can do damage with pushing and expectations.
But unschooling parents encourage our kids all the time, so I wouldn't group that with push/expect.
10. How will my kids learn self-discipline?
What do you mean by self-discipline? Do you mean the ability to stick with a plan? Do you mean the ability to do something unpleasant that just has to get done? Do you mean taking care of hygiene every day? All of those?
Ask yourself: How does schooling *really* contribute to any of that? Is schooling what made you into a responsible adult? Or was it real life (or natural inclination) that did that?
Both of my daughters have completed major projects. Both have faced frustrations and disappointments and persevered anyway. Both shower regularly and are "presentable" most of the time. Both have messy bedrooms that they have, at one time or another, voluntarily cleaned.
Both have helped us get ready for houseguests. :-)
Sound like regular kids, don't they?
11. I'm okay with unschooling for academics, but the radical unschooling lifestyle seems like too much! How do I relax about:
time spent indoors/outdoors
time spent on TV/computers/video games/reading/etc. etc. etc.
For me, most of these boil down to societal expectations ("the shoulds"). Sure, some of them can be couched in terms of the child's health and welfare or future happiness, but I found when I examined them closely, and actually tried the unschooling way, that there wasn't any evidence that the societal way led to any better outcome than the unschooling way.
My biggest weapons for stripping away societal expectations and getting down to what was right for our family are "Why?" and "Why not?"
"Chloe should have her hair brushed (even though she hates it and it makes her cry)." Why?
"MJ shouldn't wear that skimpy top?" Why not?
Anytime the reason behind a "should" boils down to any form of "what will people think," I throw it out. That reasoning is simply not valid in our lives.
"But if I let them..." - Sandra has a great collection of the horrors that various parents have imagined over the years. Well, folks, I know a whole lot of unschoolers and not one of these dreaded outcomes has come to pass.
12. I've heard unschooling described as "unparenting." Do you neglect your kids?
(this is not usually asked outright but regularly implied)
You know, this is probably in the eye of the beholder. I don't force my kids to brush their teeth, so one might say I neglect their dental hygiene. This dad didn't force his daughter not to skip school, so a judge decided he was neglectful and put him in jail.
But in both cases, it comes down to the choices of the teens in question. In neither case are the teen's choices limited by a lack of supplies, options, or information.
Sure, I could run around screaming, "Respect my authoritah!" Okay, I admit it, that happens from time to time. The result is general hilarity and, yes, the respect I deserve. :-)
But I could do more than that. I could punish, withhold privileges, nag, threaten, shame, tease, and generally make a nuisance of myself. But what would it get me? Kids with cleaner teeth? Maybe. Kids with fewer cavities? Unlikely, since they have a total of about 3 fillings between them.
What I *know* it would get me—because I have lived it—is battles. A home full of battles.
13. What if we decide to unschool and it ruins our kids' lives?
What if you leave them in school and that ruins their lives? How is that path any safer than the unschooling path, when taking a quick spin on Google will show just how fraught with peril is school?
One of my earliest steps toward embracing unschooling was brought about by someone on the old unschooling.com boards asking me if I was sure school would prevent any of the things I was fearful of. The answer, of course, was no. (I should have known this better than anybody, since I'd already had a suicidal six-year-old by the time I asked.)
There are many people who force their kids to Do Everything Right who end up with angry and rebellious kids, kids who drop out of high school, unhappy-but-successful kids, or some combination of these. There are no guarantees. All you can do is choose how you will respond to the reality of life today. All you can do is choose the kind of parent you want to be today, the kind of life you want your kids to have today, and the kind of relationship you want with them today.
Everything else follows from that.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
BUT, the news being they should be attached tonight :) and then we test on Halloween :)
Thanks for all the thoughts and energy!!
I'm doing my best to stay relaxed, although feel a bit stressed, anxious to hear what they have to say about all my embryos. It's kind of weird not having K around to go with me....... but sometimes that is just what happens in life. :)
So, were planning on implanting 2 - depending on quality. We got note today that our sperm specimen was not quality and we'll get more information (and possibly money) back from that.
I had a massage last night - felt great. K and I went out on a nice dinner date and she got me a very sweet card - blessing my womb and excited for me to be making our child(ren) :) Made my day.
Off to the shower......
I'll update when I come home if I feel up to.....and WOOT is having a woot-off for at least the next 24 hours. :) lots of good deals until they run out. Check it out!!
Sunday, October 19, 2008
I'm feeling pretty good. Today was the first day I wore jeans. I've been in my sweats and/or stretchy pants as anything tight on my stomach was not sounding very appealing.
I'll go to work for the next few days and then the transfer is on Wednesday at 11:00am. Mom and I will be hanging out and I plan on setting up shop on the couch :) I'm sure we'll take lots of naps, watch TV, and just hang out.
Nothing all that exciting!
Saturday, October 18, 2008
I'm feeling pretty good today. I slept like poo last night - had so sleep with my head propped up. We took a little outing last night but I didn't last that long.....so we'll take a little bit longer of an outing today and I should do better. We're going to stalk up on books at the library, etc. for next week.
Mom and Dad are going to hang out with Aunt Tom and Uncle Mary today and so we'll just hang low. Right now we are watching last weeks Survivor and chillin'.
Friday, October 17, 2008
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Tomorrow is retrieval, then they cook for 5 days..... then back in on Wednesday.
I'll update all the details sometime (or K will).
Lots of baby clothes scattered around tonight for good luck.....oh and pretty toes/flowers for all the women here tonight :) Pic to follow.
Monday, October 13, 2008
On Friday at the ultrasound as stated in a blog post, we had 14 eggs. Obviously we will not put all 14 back in. The doctor we see is very, very conservative. I don't believe he's ever had triplets born from his doings. He has suggested that we put 2 eggs back in. I was hoping for 3.... but asked the nurse on Friday and she said "He won't do 3". The eggs can still break off from the 2 they put in....
I go up here in about 15 minutes for another ultrasound, some blood work, and then I'll have the retrieval on Friday at 7:30am. I'll be put out for the retrieval but should be home by 11:00am at the very latest. (I think it maybe takes a 1/2 hour). Then the eggs will cook up all weekend, we'll get a call from the doctor and embryologist this weekend and possibly next week as to the "Grades" of the eggs, and Wednesday the 22nd is the transfer back in....... :)
Mom will be here Thursday - and we'll all go get our toes done! We'll lay around on Friday and then just chill out for the weekend. I'll work next Monday and Tuesday (the 20th and 21st) and then will be off until the beginning of November. I'm looking forward to the time off.
I better go snuff and puff and be on my way. :)
P.S. Cori - no John and Kate plus 8 - we'd take 1, 2 or 3 :)
Sunday, October 12, 2008
We stopped a few times on our way over......but one specific place we always stop is Hanks Mini Mart in Twisp, WA. We had parked, gone in and gone potty and then were trying to decide whether I should do my shots and/or wait until we got to Grand Coulee. I had the shots out and was ready to give them...... but then decided I'd have to give myself 2 shots and so thought I'd just wait. We had been sitting in the car with all the lights on. Dad was in the drivers seat, K was in the passenger seat, and I was on the back drivers side. We were just beginning to think about leaving, turning on the car, etc......and all the sudden BAM, and we moved. A black F-150 truck hit our 1999 Camry. They backed into the drivers side front panel and some of the drivers side door. It was totally driveable......but a bit of a shake up. That took an extra 20 mins to get insurance, etc. figured out. (Thankfully he had insurance.......and weird thing is - he lives in Burlington!)
We got to Grand Coulee about 10:30pm and I was completely exhausted and just wanted to hit the sack. I noticed when I got in bed that there were mouse nibbles on our duvet cover. I was a bit grossed out about it but they washed everything and I had come to the realization that there are just going to be mice in our place sometimes because we just can't close every single hole. Slept great Friday night. Saturday morning we woke up, were having coffee....and K says "Randi, wanna see something!"? She proceeds to take the towels off of the arms of the leather chair we have........to bear us nothing but yellow padding. SOMETHING had eaten the arms of our chairs!! Now.......this something had eaten the chairs, paper towel, towels, more bedding, etc. A mouse possibly could do this, but we're thinking a RAT. ugh. So.... thank you to some very special family members:
- Mom - For turning our heat on and noticing the big stinker
- Chris and Denise - For cleaning up the turds, doing the laundry and such
- Dad - for calling on the troops to take care of the mess
- Tom and Mary - for the support of the others :)
Saturday night, Herman the Vermin decided at 1am it was time to chew on the wood! Nonetheless, we were both kinda creeped out. We got back to sleep though and again at 4am we were once again woken to chewing on something. We're pretty sure he is under the house. We've now sprayed foam in every nook and cranny that may POSSIBLY have been a spot he could come in through. We've closed up some bigger holes, and now have put rat poison out for him to eat till his heart is content. We have asked Uncle Joe to check on our place once a week and just check to see if Herman is still alive and well and/or dead. We're not heading over again for the winter so I guess we'll see if more things are chewed our next go 'round. Sure creeps ya out thinking there is an animal of some sort in your house while trying to sleep!!
On Friday when I went for my ultrasound I had 14 eggs! They like to have 5-10 so that was a very good number. I was a bit disappointed, only because my body naturally made over 20....but they took over my body for this IVF cycle and so my body didn't make as many as it normally would. Still, 14 is very good.
I have another appointment tomorrow (Monday) for an ultrasound, bloodwork and then the eggs get taken out on Friday!! :)
Thursday, October 09, 2008
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Tonight I got together with a friend at a local coffee house and got introduced to her new son Owen. Very very cute! I really enjoy this friend and her natural ways!!
Tomorrow night is Yoga again :) and I'm really enjoying all the calm aspects of it. I think it is helping me to keep more even keeled emotionally and I believe also helps my stomach to stay more on track.
Today I haven't been feeling all that hot. I didn't feel all that well yesterday either. I think we may now have it nailed down to certain hours after the follistim shot......(approx 10am-1pm) I've been battling a few migraines here and there too.......which I'm sure is from the medicine also. All in all, it isn't that bad - just takes some adjusting.
I'm getting a bit anxious for Friday to see how many eggs I'm making! The sweet receptionist called today from the clinic to check on K and I and see how I was feeling. You just don't get this in a BIG office. We are so blessed to have a small IVF clinic close enough to work that we don't have to take that much time off and it is really like a family.
I think we may head to Target to get some blueberry granola that I've been craving ever since I had it a few weeks ago and to buy some pretzels to help my stomach at work to calm down a bit.
We're headed to Coulee for the weekend with Dad. Don't know what pass we're going to take with all the snow.....the plan right now is North Cascades.....we'll see how it looks come Friday.
Over and out.
Sunday, October 05, 2008
Fast forward to 9:30pm....go looking for my medicine. No where to be found. Do I remember right that I put it on the bathroom counter? bags are emptied.....no medicine in sight.
Next step.....did a cat knock it off into the garbage can? What are the odds that K would have emptied the bathroom garbage tonight (and into a separate bag) and we dug it open....and yep, sure enough in that bag of bathroom trash - was my $200 bottle of nose spray).
Now, the best part is.....if she hadn't happen to put it into a separate bag (which normally isn't done) we would've been sifting through fish guts and goo to find it.
Nose spray is done - dumpster diving is done - and I'm off to bed.
Tomorrow night we're headed to Bham to have dinner at a friends house!
Tuesday I have YOGA and missed last Thursday and can't wait to stretch and relax again!
Wednesday a group of ladies from a mothering board of mine are getting together at a local coffee shop!! CAN'T WAIT!
Thursday is YOGA.
Friday we're heading with dad to Grand Coulee for the weekend to close up shop.
Monday I start shots for the baby! YAHOO! :) I have my first "real" appointment to check my eggs on Friday morning..... can't wait to see what I produce!!
We're talking Christmas lights and trying to figure out what to do and/or where to get what.........
Rhody and/or Bonga if you're reading this - my Skagit Christmas sign is in my window :) feel free to put yours in at anytime!! :)